Where you goin’, Judd Apatow?

(1)  G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra ($56.2 million, $14.025 per screen):  We live in an era that can easily find a true blockbuster making around $56.2 million on its opening day, so it’s hard to be too impressed by this opening weekend.  On the other hand, it’s a decent enough rollout, and I won’t be the least bit surprised if it holds up relatively well over the next few weeks.  The movie seems to be entertaining the type of people who are likely to be entertained by a movie like this; they might well make it a genuine hit.

Is it just me, or does the movie kinda remind you of a feature-length version of one of those clips of films Vincent Chase is supposedly starring in on Entourage?  You know, you see those clips of Aquaman or Medellin and you’re not sure if you’re supposed to actually think they look awesome, or if you’re supposed to be kinda amused by the idea that someone would think you would think they look awesome.  G.I. Joe is kinda like that, and Channing Tatum is about as appealing a lead as Vincent Chase … which ain’t sayin’ much.

(2)  Julie & Julia ($20.1 million, $8539 per screen):  This opening feels maybe just a wee bit weak to me; I was kinda thinking it might get closer to $30 million.  Still, when you consider how many of the tickets were probably sold at the discounted senior-citizen price, this is a fairly solid, if unspectacular, opening.  I’d expect the legs to be considerable; don’t be surprised when the movie ends up making $100 million.

(3)  G-Force ($9.8 million, $2816 per screen, $86.1 million total):  Speaking of movie that are going to make $100 million, please pardon me for a moment while I vomit bits of fried chicken into my upper throat region.  Mmm, they’re bitter.

(4)  Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince ($8.8 million, $2570 per screen, $273.8 million total):  Looks like those IMAX screens helped a little, but only a little.  This movie has nothing much to be ashamed of, but considering that ginormous opening day was pretty darn ginormous, well, it’s all felt like a big letdown since then.  In reality, though, it’s performed the same way all of the Potter films have done since the first one.  The next one comes out in the fall, and I’ll be interested to see if the return to the days of falling leaves and visible breath prompt an uptick in the receipts.

(5)  Funny People ($7.8 million, $2615 per screen, $40.4 million total):  Judd Apatow officially takes one on the chin.  The opening weekend was a slight disappointment; the second weekend is a near-disaster, plummeting 65% and wiping away any chance that this one could turn into a word-of-mouth hit (like Apatow’s previous films, The 40-Year-Old and Knocked Up).  This may also wipe away any chance Adam Sandler may have had at becoming a bankable star in serious roles.  Since previous efforts like Punch-Drunk Love, Spanglish, and Reign Over Me all fizzled, he managed to make it to a fourth strike; surely he’s out by this point.  Kind of a shame, since this undoubtedly means we’re due for another decade of incredibly, abysmally unfunny fart gags, dick jokes, and Rob Schneider cameos.  Kill me now.

It’s also another blow to the budding stardom of Seth Rogen, who has been in several commercial misfires in a row (including Zack and Miri Make a Porno and Observe and Report).  Sony must be feeling pretty nervous about that Green Hornet movie he’s making for the director of flop Be Kind, Rewind (Michel Gondry).  If Rogen now can’t manage to hit in an Apatow flick, it may mean America has dumped him.

And frankly, the more I think about it, the less I like Funny People, which has occasional flashes of inspiration but is largely a movie with no sense of direction.

(6)  The Ugly Truth ($7 million, $2353 per screen, $69 million total):  Man, this thing has made $70 million?  Seriously?

(7)  A Perfect Getaway ($5.6 million, $2670 per screen):  For a movie with not a great deal of promotion starring Milla Jovovich and zero zombies, this could have actually gone a lot worse.  Universal clearly dumped the movie into the marketplace, and can’t have been expecting much more than what they got.

(8)  Aliens in the Attic ($4 million, $1287 per screen, $16.2 million total):  Man, for a second weekend, that is a terrible per-screen average.  How on earth did Fox manage to get this thing onto over 3000 screens?

(9)  Orphan ($3.7 million, $1643 per screen, $34.8 million total):  Oughta be on DVD any second now.

(10)  (500) Days of Summer ($3.7 million, $4559 per screen, $12.3 million total):  Playing on about 800 screens, that per-screen average suggests that Fox would have been better advised to turn those 3000 screens showing Aliens in the Attic to this little arthouse darling.  Considering how many movies come out next week, it won’t be easy to get into many more theatres than it’s already in, and that might well keep it from blossoming into a true hit.

Speaking of next week, man, I dunno if I’m just out of practice from taking a week off or what, but I have no frickin’ clue what anything is going to make.

The winner of the weekend will probably be either G.I. Joe or District 9, which certainly has the ‘net a-buzzin’ … but that doesn’t always translate to bucks.  I think it’s going to end up in second place with a bit more than $20 million.

The Time Traveler’s Wife would smell like a hit in February, but in August, it seems like a castoff.  I think women might be busy seeing Julie & Julia and not caring about Eric Bana.  Also, Rachel McAdams might once have seemed sure to be The Next Big Thing, but she’s been off the radar for too long for me to think she’s got any real pull.  I think this movie will be lucky to do $15 million; then again, it’s based on a best-seller, which sometimes helps.

The Goods might benefit from a desire in fans of The Hangover to see another raunchy comedy, but I honestly have no sense of how well this movie has been promoted.  BoxOfficeMojo.com lists it as opening on only 1500 screens, which does not seem like a vote of confidence.  I’m gonna say $12 million.

Bandslam … what the fuck is a Bandslam, and does anyone care?

That leaves Ponyo, which gets an overly optimistic 800-screen release and will be lucky to crack $2 million unless I’m badly mistaken.  And in this instance, I hope I’m VERY badly mistaken.

Well, that didn’t happen, but here’s one record which did fall: Half-Blood Prince is now the champeen for worldwide five-day release, pulling in a bit less than $397 million (that breaks the previous record held by Spider-Man 3, which made nearly $382 million in its opening five days).

As with many franchises that have hard-core followings, you can expect the box-office to drop off by sixty percent or more next weekend.  Regardless, Warner Bros. will be rolling in cash this week, and the series shows no signs of abating in popularity.

(2)  Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs ($17.5 million, $4601 per screen, $151.8 million total):  Down 36% this weekend, the prehistoric critters got only mildly wounded by Harry and friends.

(3)  Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen ($13.6 million, $3550 per screen, $363.8 million total):  The Autobots continue to mediocre their way to $400 million.  My mouth tastes suddenly of yellow spit.

(4)  Bruno ($8.3 million, $3015 per screen, $49.5 million total):  Down nearly 73% this weekend, and no surprise there.  Bruno is likely to make less than half of what Borat made, which is fairly pathetic as far as big-ticket sequels go.

(5)  The Proposal ($8.2 million, $2724 per screen, $128 million total):  Another solid weekend for the romantic comedy, although it will probably take a hit at the hands of The Ugly Truth this weekend.  Alternatively, if that one hits and sells out screens, The Proposal might actually benefit from it.

(6)  The Hangover ($8.1 million, $3066 per screen, $235.7 million total):  Refusing to go away, the comedy of the summer is off only 17% from last weekend, and will probably be around until Labor Day, at this rate.

(7)  Public Enemies ($7.7 million, $2485 per screen, $79.6 million per screen):  Can the gangster flick make it to $100 million?  If so, it ain’t gonna be by much.  Still, it’s been a moderate success, and nobody involved has to hang their heads.

(8)  Up ($3.1 million, $1859 per screen, $279.5 million total):  Close to being out of the top ten, it’s been a great run for Pixar with this one.  If they made a feature-length movie about pieces of corn inside turds, I’d hesitate to bet against it being a classic.

(9)  My Sister’s Keeper ($2.8 million, $1438 per screen, $41.5 million total):  Yawn.

(10)  I Love You Beth Cooper ($2.7 million, $1478 per screen, $10.3 million total):  Double yawn.

(12)  (500) Days of Summer:  Averaging $30,907 per screen in its 27-screen opening weekend, this one stands a chance at being the first genuine limited-release hit of the summer.  If, that is, it can find screens to play on during August … and that’s no given.

I care so little about this weekend’s releases that I can’t even be bothered to make predictions.

But they’re not sticking with me, for some reason.  I can remember a few details here and there, and the broad strokes of the stories are still more or less present in my head … but I spent a large portion of the sixth movie thinking to myself, “Man, I don’t remember much of this.”

Is that a problem with me or a problem with the movie(s)?

Either way, it’s definitely a big part of the reason why I can’t quite summon up any love for them.  I definitely like them, and I’d guess that at some point a few years down the line I’m going to be shelling out a couple of hundred bucks for a big, fat Blu-ray box set of all eight movies.

But do I love them?  I just can’t honestly answer that question with a “yes.”

Spoilers from this point forward.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is a movie that is full of tiny, subtle emotion, and while it’s dealing with this sort of thing, it’s terrific.  Take, for one example, most of the scenes between Harry and Ginny.  There is a surprising sexuality to these scenes that is both serious and funny, and also manages to be quite suggestive without sacrificing even a little bit of the chasteness that must necessarily come with a PG-rated film.  It works almost completely.  (As do Hermione’s scenes with Ron.)

Thing is, when the movie gets to what has got to be considered the most emotional development of the series thus far — Dumbledore’s murder at the hands of Snape — the movie drops the ball.  Right at the goal line … just fumbles it right out onto the grass.

Dumbledore’s death ought to be the kind of thing that milks tears out of every eye in the house.  Never seen a Harry Potter movie before?  Too bad, it’s time for you to cry now.  Seen ‘em all nineteen times each?  Time to use those napkins, coated though they may be in theatre-butter fingerprints.

If Star Trek could manage this in its first ten minutes with a character we’d never even seen before, why can’t Half-Blood Prince?  Dumbledore is by now one of the more famous characters in all of fantasy fiction; how come his death doesn’t have the resonance of, say, Gandalf’s fall at Khazad-dûm?  It’s inexcusable, really, and while it doesn’t kill the movie (not even close), I think it keeps it from being the great film some critics have insisted it is.

Some of this, I think, is down to the choice of composer.  Nicholas Hooper, hand-picked by director David Yates, began his affiliation with the series on Order of the Phoenix, for which he turned in a score that is, at best, serviceable.  His work here is similarly uninspired.  Compare it to John William’s work on the first three films; admitted, J.W.’s music was occasionally overbearing, but it also created a terrific atmosphere (I defy you to listen to “Hedwig’s Theme” and not feel a bit as if you’re on the Hogwarts Express).  It established an emotional connection to the world that, had he been present on the fourth, fifth, and sixth films as well, could have worked wonders.

But it need not have been Williams, specifically.  Any genuinely good composer could have turned the trick.  Go take a look back at the Khazad-dûm sequence in The Fellowship of the Ring, and pay attention to Howard Shore’s work.  It’ll slay you.

Now, granted, that’s probably one of the best scores ever written for a film, so it’d be a bit unfair to expect something as good in Half-Blood Prince, or, really, in any movie.  But, again, let’s look a short ways back at Star Trek, and at Michael Giacchino’s music during George Kirk’s sacrifice onboard the U.S.S. Kelvin.  I’d stop well short of claiming that this is one of the best sequences of film scoring in movie history, but there’s no need for superlatives; it’s enough to say simply that it’s a remarkably well-scored scene, and one that takes full advantage of what film music can do.  Film music, used properly, works to emotionally link the viewer with the movie, and to tie those connections together tightly; good music in a movie will tip it over the edge from being something an audience is enjoying to being something the audience is, while watchint it, living and breathing.  Good film music, used properly, turns a movie from an entertainment into an experience.

Half-Blood Prince does not take advantage of what film music can do.  It’s just that simple.  I don’t want to be too harsh on Nicholas Hooper, who is probably doing his best, and simply may not be capable of better.  Instead, this is where I start blaming David Yates, and the film’s producers, who ought to have realized Hooper’s relative inability after the last film and hired somebody who could do a better, fuller job.

And that’s not where I stop blaming Yates, a director whom I know only from his work on the Potter series; based on those two films, I think I can safely say that while he obviously possesses a keen visual sense and a remarkable affinity for directing actors, he doesn’t have the world’s best sense of storytelling in terms of the broad strokes.  He’s good within a scene; he knows how to visually convey information.  However, I don’t think he’s great at piecing an overall story together.  I was captivated for the entirety of this movie, and yet when it was over, I felt hollow, as if nothing I’d just seen had quite managed to add up.  It’s like I’d had a six-course meal, but was still hungry.

This, I think, is the difference between a competent director and a great director.  A great director — a Spielberg, Hitchcock, Gilliam, Jackson, Eastwood, Kubrick — will have his eye on the movie as a whole.  He might occasionally fail, but more often than not, he won’t.  Maybe Yates will yet prove to be a great director, but in that regard, Half-Blood Prince proves to be a setback.

Enough focusing on the negatives.  This is too good a movie to dwell on the less successful aspects.  I’m frustrated that it’s not a classic, but a movie doesn’t need to be a classic in order for me to enjoy it, and I certainly enjoyed this one.

First of all, the acting is great.  Daniel Radcliffe has grown more comfortable in the role of Harry with each successive film, and this one is no different. I’m not convinced Radcliffe will have much of a career outside of the Potter movies, but he’s going to be forever a star based on those movies alone, and maybe that’s enough.

Emma Watson, who in some of the earlier films was doing extremely mannered work that felt more than a bit lifeless (almost as if the director was acting out what he wanted her to do and then having her replicate it beat for beat), has really grown over the past few films, and she’s great here.  In some ways, it’s a thankless role in this particular movie, since Hermione is doing little more than yearning for Ron and providing moral support for Harry.  However, both of those elements are crucial to making the events of the final book seem inevitable, and that’s likely why they’re given such weight in this film.

It’s hard to say too much about how funny Rupert Grint is as Ron.  He’s hilarious, and while I’d sympathize with someone who said the comedy here is a bit too broad, I wouldn’t agree.

I was also impressed by Bonnie Wright, playing Ginny.  She’s been with the series as long as the rest of the cast, and it appears that the producers struck a bit of gold when casting her.  I’d be curious to know how much weight they put into finding an actress to play Ginny; I’d be willing to bet the answer to this question is entirely dependant upon how much of the story J.K. Rowling knew at that point in time, and whether she indicated to the producers one way or another how important Ginny would become.  Either way, Bonnie Wright was a find.  She’s marvelous.  She hasn’t done a great deal of film work outside of the Potter films, but I’d be willing to bet she’s going to do a lot more.

I’ve got similarly nice things to say about Jessie Cave, who plays Lavender Brown.  Cave, I would argue, steals almost every scene she’s in.  It’s, again, fairly broad comedy, and in some ways it doesn’t quite fit in with the rest of the movie.  It’s also hilarious, and my take on the broadness of the Ron/Lavender subplot is that it helps keeps Hermione’s reactions from seeming too maudlin and melodramatic.  And that helps us stay emotionally invested in Hermione’s character arc; as such, Jessie Cave’s role in this film is fairly crucial, and she knocks it out of the park.  I’d love to know how many hours were lost due to people cracking up over her shenanigans as Lavender.

The also-crucial role of Draco Malfoy is also pretty well served in the film, with Tom Felton doing good, troubled work as the young prince of darkness.  Malfoy’s actions — and inactions — in this movie will have serious repercussions over the last two films, and if Felton hadn’t been up to the task, the entire series would have suffered.  But again, it looks as if the producers did well in the extensive casting sessions all those years ago.

As for the adult cast, well, what needs to be said about it other than that it is outstanding?  Michael Gambon leads the way, providing a calm center of wisdom as Dumbledore.  I’m sure the last two films will feature him in some way, but I think they’re going to be notably poorer without his frequent presence.

Alan Rickman, of course, does great work as Snape, and that’s nothing unusual.  Rickman has killed in this role for nearly an entire decade now, and I look forward to seeing some of the meaty scenes he’ll get in Deathly Hallows.

Finally, let’s save some glowing words of praise for Jim Broadbent, who is simply awesome as Horace Slughorn.  Like, Oscar-nomination good.  If one has nothing else kind to say about the Harry Potter films, I think it can at least be said that they’re given some great supporting roles to some very deserving actors, from Rickman to Brendan Gleeson to Imelda Staunton to Broadbent, and those just for a start.  I enjoy the movies for many reasons, and these performances are near the top of the list.

In most other regards, Half-Blood Prince is also top-notch.  It looks great, with lovely cinematography and state-of-the-art visual effects and nice costumes.  “Sumptuous” would probably be a good word to use to describe this film, and the series as a whole.  If I had a complaint, it would be that the movies too often feel a bit too insular; I’d love to get more looks at the broader world — wizarding and muggle alike — of this particular universe.  But that’s a small complaint, and a mostly unfair one; what’s there is one of the best-realized fantasy worlds ever put on film, and it’s one any fan of the genre should probably be thankful for.

My final thoughts on my first viewing of this film is that it’s well worth one’s time.  Maybe not quite the classic it might’ve been, but hey, that’s no crime.  It’s certainly better than most of the competition.

What do you think?  Will tomorrow’s midnight screenings of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince set a new record for best midnight opening?  The current champeen is The Dark Knight, which last year at about this same time pulled in $18.5 million during the wee hours of its opening day.  The runner-up is currently Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith, which bagged $16.9 million.  For a compariosn, this year’s Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is the third-place opener, with an even $16 million.

Clearly Harry’s chances are lessened due to the absence of the word “revenge” in the film’s title.

What say you?

(1)  Bruno ($30.4 million, $11,040 per screen):  As a de-facto sequel to Borat — which made nearly as much in its second weekend as this one did in its debut– there is simply no way to look at this as anything other than a disappointment.  Consider the fact that its Friday numbers accounted for nearly half of its overall weekend, and I think it’s clear that Bruno is little more than a blip on the summer-movie radar, destined to be all but forgotten by this time next week.  Move along, nothing to see here.

(2)  Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs ($28.5 million, $6948 per screen, $120.5 million total):  Down roughly thirty percent this weekend, it’s a solid hold for the toon, for — as I believe I said last week, too — I can’t shake the feeling that Fox must have wanted more.  If nothing else, this offers proof that summer really isn’t the be-all, end-all of blockbuster release dates; the previous two films in this series opened in the spring, and this one is only doing about as well as those did; clearly, at least in this case, it’s the movie, not the release date.

(3)  Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen ($24.2 million, $5637 per screen, $339.2 million total):  Dropping only about forty percent this weekend, the Autobots continue to chug along, damn their hollow metal souls.  They’re likely to suffer a bit at the hands of Hogwarts next week, though.

(4)  Public Enemies ($14.1 million, $4230 per screen, $66.5 million total):  Down 45% this weekend, that’s not bad, but neither is it an omen of particularly good word of mouth.  Look for this movie to top out at about $85 million and enjoy a long, comfortable life in the home market.

(5)  The Proposal ($10.5 million, $3327 per screen, $113.7 million total):  Down less than twenty percent this weekend, Ryan Reynolds has considerable cause to celebrate this weekend; between this and the news that he’s been cast as the Green Lantern in that movie, he’s doing okay for himself the past few days.

(6)  The Hangover ($9.9 million, $3308 per screen, $222.4 million total):  If someone had told you on May 1 that The Hangover would make close to $250 million, would you have believed them?  Yeah, me neither.

(7)  I Love You Beth Cooper ($5 million, $2691 per screen):  That’s a miserable debut, but Fox dumped the movie, so it probably could have been even worse.  Clearly, Hayden Panettiere is going to have to wait to become a star.

(8)  Up ($4.6 million, $2115 per screen, $273.7 million total):  It doesn’t appear that Up is going to be able to make it to the $300 million mark, but it’s still got an outside shot.  Definitely one of this summer’s biggest success stories, and probably its best movie.  Until G-Force comes out, that is.

(9)  My Sister’s Keeper ($4.1 million, $1710 per screen, $35.8 million total):  Yawn…

(10)  The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 ($1.6 million, $1434 per screen, $61.4 million total):  …so sleepy…

Wednesday brings us Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, and if the reviews are any indication, it’s not only the best film of the series, but it’s the best by a large margin.  Advance ticket sales are through the roof, so look for the record for midnight-show openings to possibly be toppled.  This is a perennially strong series, so who knows how high the opening weekend could go.  I don’t think the five-day record being broken is in the cards … but … those advance sales are awfully strong.

My prediction: from Wednesday through Sunday, $185 million.