Loaded Couch Potatoes

WE HAVE TO GO BAAAAAAAACK!!!

You love the title.

In less than a week, the TV series LOST returns for its final season. We will finally have all the questions that they have left with us answered. We will see who ends up with who, who ends up dead, and why / how the hell was walt killing so many birds?!?!

Being a huge fan of the series, I like to theorize whats going to happen, and then rub it in everyones faces if i get it right. So ill be using Loaded Couch Potatoes as my logging site to time and date stamp my theories. I will post a few general theories i have in the main body below, and then after each episode i will amend the theories in the comments. I am more than open to hearing thoughts on my theories, or your own theories. Feel free to use this as a way to timestamp your ideas so you can rub it in later on. I know LOST can spawn some pretty heated discussion, but plzplzplz keep it civil if you do want to chime in.

If you have not caught up to thru season 5 of the series, you may not want to read this as it may spoil some of your fun later on.

So. Without further delay.

SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT

ENDING THEORY: Jacob has used his loopholes and crazy magic powers to have the real John Locke, not Unlocke / Smoke Monster Locke, replace him as the “Man of the Island”.  For some reason something happens and throws the cast back in time to an alternate reality or timeline where the whole process starts over with Jack in a wheelchair being the man of faith, and telling the whole story again with different people in different roles. The story continues to loop itself with changes in roles each time the loop cycles thru.

Other Theories

– As soon as Ben and Unlocke emerge from the chamber inside the foot of the statue, all Hell will break loose.

–The man we saw with Jacob on the beach will wind up being responsible for any of the “bad” things that happen on the island, possibly even off-island. “Bad” is in quotation marks because at this point the “good” and “bad” sides are getting more and more blurred. His name will be Esau. For the rest of the article, even if its not his real name, i will be referring to Jacob’s nemesis as Esau to make things easier for me and everyone else to follow. Dont get the reference? Let me google that for you.

– Ben will have been the victim of a long con (really really really long con) that was created by Esau to eventually work him in to being the loophole that Esau needed to kill Jacob.

– Aaron and Ji-Yeon will team up and be some crazy powered team. I dont know what they will do exactly, but i can guarantee you that whatever it is will be based in the realm of the paranormal. Fooooor sure.

– The black and white stones  that Jack took from the corpses in the cave from season one will show up again. If i had to guess, id say either in the very beginning, or the very end of the season. Nowhere in between. I also think the general reference of black and white will be used much much more frequently.

– Im still sticking with Aaron and Ji-Yeon being the Adam and Eve skeletons from season one. However im hearing filming rumors and whatnot that may make me amend this later.

– There wont be Team Locke / Jack / Ben / Whidmore anymore. Now its all Team Jacob and Team Esau. Black and White. Good and Evil. And i would love to see this Team Jacob beat the shit out of the sparkling glitter fairies version of Team Jacob.

– Everything that we have been taught and learned will be completely broken down and re-learned. Characters will switch attitudes, careers, really just lives in general. I want to say that they will switch within each other, so that all the lives still exist in the same way, just lived by different people, but there could be completely new elements. Confused? Example: Jack gets reset and starts out as a man of faith instead of a man of science, and “re-lives” his life accordingly.

– Jack will be in a wheelchair. When exactly I cant really predict. But I think that with all the irony that floats around on this show, that Jack in a wheelchair absolutely has to happen.

– The Others ancestors came to the island on the Black Rock. Before that it was just Jacob and Esau.

– Im going out on a limb with this one, but in the end after all of the facts are revealed, i think Jacob will wind up being more of a villain than everyone thinks.

– Alive or dead, Charlie will sing me a song and make me cry.

– Whidmore will be found to be telling the truth about Ben tricking him and the Others in to getting him off the island and replacing him with Ben as the leader. I also believe he will come back and perform one or two tricks to completely woo you back to his side.

– Claire will be found to be alive, and will be the new Rousseau of the island. Crazy jungle lady looking for her stolen baby.

– Richard will not be revealed as a time traveler, but as some form of immortal. Ive switched my stance on this one. I believed the opposite for a season or two. I hear we get an entire Richard episode this season. Im pumped.

– The whispers will be revealed to have some sort of scientific backing related to time travel. Not just purely paranormal.

– Vincent will return, and he will save the day. Twice.

– Miles will be the source for more info.

– The dead people that Hurley talk to will not be considered the same dead people that Miles talks to. I almost think that the people hurley are talking to are part of a long con from Esau. Im not completely sold on that yet, tho. But I am sold on them being a different type of interaction.

SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT

That’s all I have for the moment. Im sure more will start flowing after I get in to more discussions with my fellow Losties, and they will be added to the comments to preserve the original post date for this blogish deal.