Loaded Couch Potatoes

Sloth review final episode of Chuck … ever?  Sloth spoil episode like there no tomorrow.

Sloth rather emotional at moment … Sloth need moment to compose self after monumentous series season finale of favorite television show, Chuck.

Sloth okay now.  Sloth take Xanax and drink seventeen bottle of Strawberry Hill Boone’s Farm.  Hee heee, hoo-whee, Sloth feel pretty doog now.

Focus, Sloth!   Think about executive at NBC, who even now deciding fate of Chuck.  Think about them sleep in plushy bed with their stupid fat head on silk pillowcase, not aware — possibly not care! — how approximately eleventy-nine kadillion people spend night not sleep, instead weep in corner worry about fate of favorite show Chuck!

Rrrraaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sloth now fully focus!

Sloth be cool.  Sloth not want NBC executive know how upset they make Sloth.  Sloth review episode like nothing amiss.

So, Sloth, what happen this episode Chuck, “Chuck Versus the Ring”?

Well, Sloth, what happen this: Chuck resign job at Buy More; Sarah reassign to head of new intersect program, work with Bryce Larkin (his hair bother Sloth); Casey give Chuck paycheck for entire intersect mission, Chuck apparently now roll in currency; Casey rejoin special forces division, go on mission; Clark Griswold show up at wedding, say he kill Ellie if Chuck not deliver intersect cube within thirty-forty minute; Chuck ask Morgan delay wedding, Morgan bring Jeffster to wedding, Jeffster perform rousing rendition Styx classic “Mr. Roboto”; Chuck call Casey for help, but Casey not answer phone, so Chuck leave message; Chuck, Sarah, and Casey with special forces division stop Clark Griswold, destroy wedding reception room in process; Jeffster shoot off firework at end of  rousing rendition Styx classic “Mr. Roboto,” cause fire sprinkler system go off, ruin entire wedding; Chuck use government pay, buy Ellie new wedding.  (Wedding much improve, in Sloth opinion; less traditional but more intimate, replacing illusion of adornment with sophistication of timeless element like wind, sand, surf, sky.  Sloth find Chuck wedding approach to be bohemian, yet classical.)

Wedding reception proceed; Bryce Larkin in danger; Orion reveal he have intersect in head, alert Chuck and Sarah to danger; Casey nearly kill by rogue operative (who kill Clark Griswold), but he join Chuck and Sarah in attempt rescue Bryce Larkin; Larkin take fatal bullet injury, boo hoo; Chuck make heroic decision, load dangerous new intersect into self.

Chuck then reveal he have awesome new kung fu soldier capability, take down entire team rogue operative by self.  Sarah look stun, Casey look jealous.

Episode end!

Sloth spend nine minute vomit up Rocky Road, he so overwhelm by sheer awesome of end to episode.

Sloth have multitude of thought, try to boil down to essential:

(1)  If this series finale, is great end.

(2)  Chuck producer so dumb on occasion.  How you have Captain Archer and Captain Sheridan in same episode, yet not have a good scene together?  That seem like waste.  Not awesome.

(3)  Jeffster, on other hand…?  Awesome.  Also awesome that Awesome realize Jeffster awesome.

(4)  Poppa Awesome have most awesome line of episode: “Son … why are you letting Sam Kinison and an Indian lesbian wreck your wedding?”  Sloth lol at that BIG time, but he not realize Lester actually woman.  Sloth think Lester terrible name for woman; how Sloth suppose know he a she?  Sloth blame, again, on Chuck producer.  On other hand, Lester frequently shown lust after women in Buy More; Sloth might have known from that that he lesbian!

(5)  Sloth impress by way writer realize that Chuck have need for way pay for Ellie new wedding.  Therefore, write in scene of Chuck receive paycheck early in episode so that it not seem too convenient when Chuck able to finance entire wedding out of pocket at moment notice.  Good write!

(6)  Sloth extremely intrigue by idea of make Chuck into Neo for next season.  Sloth suspect many fan of Chuck upset by such potential large change to show format, but Sloth think that format occasional too rigid, and predictable; bold format shake-up seem like quick way of re-energize entire series, in Sloth opnion.

(7)  Episode end with “To Be Continued…”  Sloth still drunk on pill and malt wine, but Sloth interpet this as sign NBC definite renewing show for third season.  Sloth find hard to imagine NBC allow Chuck producer — stupid producer — place “To Be Continued” card on end of episode if continuation not sure to happen.  Sloth sure NBC not that stupid.  NBC executive know what Sloth do to entire family while NBC executive watch with eyelid cut off so closing eye not option … NBC executive not want risk such pain.

Sloth love Chuck!